Week 5 @ The MTC (19 Years, Swear Words & Donuts)

Jeff Bolingbroke
Sep 9, 2017
3 min read

Now I've got your attention, don't I?

I know what you're thinking: Swear words? What's that supposed to mean? What are they teaching the missionaries in the MTC? 19 years? Donuts? Why donuts?

Well, worry not, my students, for all will be revealed shortly. In the meantime, take a seat on the proverbial log around the proverbial campfire, and eat some proverbial s'mores as I tell the tale of my antics that have come to pass this week.

Well, first thing's first: We've made a discovery. A discovery that I think changes science entirely. You know what that is? Time doesn't work in the MTC. My reasoning is thus: I am fairly certain that it hasn't been a whole week since I last emailed everyone. It doesn't physically feel like seven whole days have passed since last P-day came around. But still, three and a half weeks seems like forever to wait until we leave for Finland! It's aggravating, how weird time is. I'm pretty sure that the MTC warps time. Even Einstein couldn't figure it out.

Now, for the first point on the aforementioned subject: 19 years. As of Monday, I'm nineteen! It feels weird, having your birthday at the MTC. Previous to Monday, I had actually prayed for help from God to turn my heart outward, in service, instead of inward, towards myself. And my prayer was answered! I've been more earnestly trying to serve my fellowmen, and I've been very happy!

Our Tuesday evening devotional this week was from Dallin H. Oaks, of the Quorum of the Twelve! (That puts the count at four apostles, for those who are keeping track) He gave an amazing talk about being better missionaries and the mighty changes in heart that we all experience.

Now, I'm sure you all want to hear next about the donuts. There's a humorous story behind this one. I've expressed earlier in these weeks that I've been trying to eat healthier, and it's difficult, especially when the MTC has an entire ice cream bar every few days! So a few days ago, a few of our Finnish Elders, myself included, pledged to hold each other up in exercising better, and eating better. Guess what I got in the mail half an hour later? TWO DOZEN (DELICIOUS) DONUTS. We very much enjoyed them, and felt guilty afterwards. It was great. (No, we didn't share 24 donuts among 6 young men - we shared them with most of the other missionaries in our adjacent rooms)

Now, for the funny one. Swear words. Every Wednesday evening, we teach TRC - teaching resource center. The name sounds extremely boring, but it's the best! We teach people who speak Finnish! In other languages, like Spanish, they'll bring in actual non-members, who will be taught a lesson in their language by the Elders/Sisters, but since there aren't any Finnish people at all around here, we teach return missionaries. They're really fun! So, when Vanhin Olsen and Payne were teaching their lesson, they were talking with their "investigator," about the Creation and the Fall of Adam and Eve. They referenced Satan in their lesson. They didn't know why, but the guy they were teaching didn't like them saying that. Later, our teacher told us the Finnish words for Satan/the Devil are equivalent in their culture to us dropping the F-bomb in English. That presented a problem for us, as we teach about Satan being the one who tempts us, the one who causes all of the world's wickedness. So you know what the Finns call Satan? Paholainen. The Evil One. Or they'll say He Who Is Not Named. In that moment, I felt a sort of Deja vu... He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named?

In any case, it's been an eventful, and fast week. Here's our quotes!

"I can't see, my contacts are out."

-Vanhin Manner, as the lights are off

"Hey, Vanhin Gamett, remember how you just promised not to eat junk food?"

-Vanhin Bolingbroke

"Yeah, why?"

-Vanhin Gamett

"You want a donut?"

-Vanhin Bolingbroke

"Our diet starts TOMORROW!"

-Vanhin Gamett

I'm kinda sad - those are the only quotes I remember for the week! Fear not, more shall come next time around! In the meantime, I've answered a few questions, and have attached videos of such! I wasn't able to get to them all, but will do so this week!